she's just as real as you and i

but love's like pride don't seem to last long
it ain't something that you can take home
but you forget everything when you're smack dab in it
get your thrills and it's over in a minute
it seems love ain't the way that it ought to be
it tends to depend too much on anatomy
but i suppose that's all well and fine
Iill be yours if you'll be mine

stoopdudjjjjjjjjj

So there was this woman and she was on an airplane,
and she was flying to meet her fiance seaming high above the largest ocean on planet earth.
She was seated next to this man she had tried to start conversations,
but the only thing she had really heard him say was to order his Bloody Mary.
She was sitting there and she was reading this really arduous magazine article about a third world country
that she couldn't even pronounce the name of.
And she was feeling very bored and despondent.
And then suddenly there was this huge mechanical failure and one of the engines gave out,
and they started just falling thirty-thousand feet,
and the pilots on the microphone and he's saying "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, oh my god... I'm sorry" and apologizing.
And she looks at the man and says "Where are we going?" and he looks at her and he says "We're going to a party.
It's a birthday party. It's your birthday party.
Happy birthday darling. We love you very, very, very, very, very, very, very much."
And then he starts humming this little tune, it kind of goes like this: 1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 4

meh

we say we want to die
yet we look both ways before crossing the street
and our hearts speed up if a stranger is too close behind us.
maybe this is because we ant to die
on our own terms.
slitting our wrist
or swallowing too many pills.
or maybe bringing a gun to our very own heads
and pulling the trigger.
i know that
i would rather
die
on these terms
than anyone else's
 
- - - - - - - - - -
 
i wish i could say that i really felt okay and it sucks that i can't.
i wish i felt okay.
i wish i felt human.
i wish i knew what i was doing with my life.
i wish i knew who wants to be my friend.
i wish i knew who doesn't want to even be in the same place with me.
i wish i knew what my mom thought of me.
i wish i knew what i was even feeling right now.
what am i even feeling?
god, no one even knows.

strawberry fields forevaaahhhh ~